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Tough Times for a Peacemaker

One rarely forgets their first few clients. One of mine, I remember, was a businessman who walked into my office bringing with him a dispute involving a contracted sale of one his products. Having been a businessman for a long time, one could say he also had some experience with the legal system – he was begrudgingly accustomed to the adversarial way of resolving his business’ disputes through litigation.

During our first meeting, I did not speak of litigation. I asked him what was it that he really wanted, as a way to resolve the dispute.
I still remember his face when, after discussing the issues, I got his permission to call the opposing council, and contrary to what he had been used to, literally negotiated an acceptable agreement right there and then. He just couldn’t believe the dispute that had made him worry for weeks, was now over with just a phone call. The precise approach and quick resolution helped him leave the crippling impasse behind, and move forward with what he did best – business.

Make no mistake, at that time (the 90’s) I had no idea what dispute resolution was, and even my “negotiation” was done in a purely instinctive manner. Little did I know how much I had, and still have to learn. Yet back then, the rewarding feeling I got by resolving the matter and by witnessing the re-energising relief exuding from my client, provided me with an introduction to the crucial elixir of dispute resolution - to never desist in finding ways to help people resolve conflict. And I have tried, sometimes more strenuously than others, to “keep the faith” in the art of becoming a better professional, a better person and of helping build a better future for my community.

Nevertheless, we have all seen the world face many challenges in the last few days (weeks, months, years…?). The “better future” seems at time to be slipping away, like sand slipping through one’s fingers. The anger and divide just seem to be so permeated everywhere. Sometimes it may all feel a little overwhelming. Especially for us, dispute resolution professionals and enthusiasts.
Our conviction in the effectiveness of peacemaking may get shaken by some of the signs of disarray, distrust and violence humanity recalcitrantly unearths yet again.

As true peacemakers, however, we must focus to bring forth the yet many instances that shine a light onto the good there still is. We must encourage civil discourse and true empathy to be exercised as the way to move forward and evolve.

Although at times we may feel discouraged, we must remind ourselves that nothing lasts forever. Even the divide will one day end. Consequently, no matter how difficult and challenging it all may seem, we should know that by focusing on the light at the end of the tunnel, and continuing to work as peacemakers we will ensure the outcome is mostly positive, regardless of the time and effort it takes us to get there.

So, I end this short reverie in the hope that I and all of you out there keep such sharp focus, and poignant peacemaking passionately alive. After all, nothing lasts forever. In the words of one of our best, finding new paths is simply a must, for the restless few of us:

“Long summers, mild winters, rich harvests, plentiful game—none of them lasts forever. It is beyond our powers to predict the future”

”Your own life, or your band’s, or even your species’ might be owed to a restless few—drawn, by a craving they can hardly articulate or understand, to undiscovered lands and new worlds.”